Well, there's no way to sugarcoat it, this year has been just terrible. But that may be just me. Ignoring all country politics of course.
Looking back over last year's end of year post, I never would have guessed that THIS was the year following it. Half full of hope but alas, this has been a bad year and to be honest, it could all come down to just one thing. I didn't post about it, or if I did it was minimal because I'm just not the kind of person who can. I know other find comfort sharing personal stories in depth, especially if they lost someone dear to them. Anything I say about the rest of this year doesn't come close to the loss of my Nana. We lost her back in May and I still haven't come to terms with it. I miss her very much and there are days I forget she's not here anymore and think, I need to call her or even, I'll walk down the road to see her and then catch myself in that thought. She used to love watching films and as she got older, she liked the scary ones best. We used to go to the cinema together, take one of the special taxis she had vouchers for and share popcorn. I remember I saw 'Castaway' with her as well as 'Bean:The Movie' a couple of times and I think 'March of the Penguins'. Aside from these movie moments, the one thing I'll always remember her for and my sister and talked about this, was her stories. She was a master storyteller. I only hope I could ever be half as good as her.
Loosing my Nana left a huge hole in my heart but taking a leaf from her book, there have been a few positives this year. I made it back to Cinema Rediscovered and Edinburgh Film Festival this year, saw 24 films at BFI LFF (most yet for me), had some of my zines displayed at a zine festival, got to have beach holiday in Tropea with my sister which we hadn't really done before, I was quoted on a film poster (not by name but it was my words - goal for next year), I rediscovered my love and connection for Tarot as well as taking part in workshops, I have been doing reading for friends and family (if interested, let me know!), I've put myself 'out there' with new experiences to learn from as well as be amused by and I turned 30, celebrating with my amazing friends. What a way to end the decade starting a new one.
With the end of the decade, closing on all the job hunting hell, slow film festivals and all round off-ness, I really hope that I can make my Nana proud in the next one decade.
Happy New Year everyone!
